As an impressionable woman born and raised in the West, I often understood that intermingling with the opposite sex was just a natural part of human interaction. It was allowed for men and women to “just be friends”. It was also encouraged for women to climb the corporate ladder alongside with men as there was no such thing as a “gender divide. The only thing dividing male and female was a simple bathroom sign -well, not anymore.
The 21st century has become a limitless black hole of opportunities. Men and women share almost everything and are entitled to equal rights. The once unacceptable things have now been made acceptable, which is causing more problems in today's society. These issues never were a problem for me as I was just another victim of the "gender integration”society, however, as a new Muslim, living in the Western society has opened my eyes and drawn me closer to why I prefer the “gender divide” in Islam.
As a new Muslim wife, living in the Western world, I have undergone a huge transition from living the life in a gender-integrated society to the life of a gender divide. I have learnt to follow and abide by the teachings of Islam and though many see Islam as a cultural obligation rather than a religion, I have committed to my Creator and made it my way of life. Islam is a religion that teaches you how to live your life the right way and to stay out of danger and harms way, especially in the 21st century where almost everything haram (prohibited) is being made halal (permissible). Unlike the Western culture, where women travel without a mahram (male guardian), Muslim women must travel with a male guardian (i.e., husband, father, uncle) at all times. A Muslim woman must also never be alone with a non-mahram as it says in our Hadith by Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him), "whenever a man is alone with a woman the Devil makes a third". Most women in the West often intermingle freely with strangers from dating websites and club parties. This is seen as a “halal” way of meeting a potential mate, but many women do not know the dangers in such a “tradition”. Often many women end up raped, sexually harassed, or with an unwanted pregnancy. Fortunately, I was able to remove myself from this Western culture as I married shortly after I became Muslim. I was never used to being accompanied everywhere with a male guardian. I used to travel alone with ignorance and freedom thinking nothing would ever happen to me, but then I would be informed by the news about young teens being followed home, raped, or brutally murdered and that really made me realize the susceptibility of being in harms way is much greater when you are alone than when you are with your mahram. I thank God that I wasn’t one of those who made it in the headlines.
I now realize the importance of the gender “divide” in Islam and why women are segregated from male “strangers”. Along with this importance of prohibiting men and women from intermingling freely, another transition I had to face was women and dress. In the Western society, there are no appropriate dress codes. Women are allowed to bare as much skin as possible, wear extremely form fitting clothing, and are also allowed to dress like a man. There seems to be an ongoing confusion in the West as women believe that dressing promiscuously is seen as “feminine”. The gender of the female is categorized in two complete extremes; on one end of the spectrum, a woman revealing her body is considered “womanly” and on the other end of the spectrum, and females also identify themselves by dressing androgynously with their gender unidentifiable.
In the 21st century many will continue to find that there are no limits to the way Western women dress and many of these women don’t understand what it means when they see a Muslim woman covered. The difference between the dress of a Western woman and the dress of a Muslim woman is obvious. The Muslim woman wears a headscarf known as a hijab, and a long loose robe known as an abaya. The reasons for this are to hide her beauty and adornments from the foreign men and strangers. In Islam, beauty of a woman is only reserved for her Lord and for her husband. There is no “free-show” with the Muslim woman and her dress code. I found this transition to be the most rewarding. I loved the respectful dignified reasons behind the woman’s veil. I was able to wear my hijab 2 weeks after I became Muslim, and I wore it with true pride. Why should a woman flaunt her “goods” to a foreign man who would only look at her as a sex object? A Muslim woman, well covered is also well respected. I realized that the Western culture, that I was born and raised in, had more gender flaws than any other culture or society. These gender flaws in the West make the men and women seem confused, lost with their identity, while acting like swine. This was the only environment I was immersed in and I did not know how to live my life until I discovered Islam.
The guidelines of how to live your life as a successful woman can be found in the Qur’an. This book was revealed to the last Prophet, Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him), who was instructed by God to deliver clear instructions to mankind on how to live a peaceful, harmonious life. In Islam, men and women are equal and their gender plays a huge role in society. Both genders have their purpose and their specific function in this world. In the 21st century, it is unclear of the roles that men and women play in the West, as often it is seen that men play the role of women and vice versa. I have no confusion with my role as a woman in Islam, as I now know that I represent modesty through the way I dress, loyalty through my duties as a wife, and submission as a weak servant to my Lord. I choose Islam because the “gender divide” strengthens my role as a female in today’s Western society.
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