Saturday, August 20, 2011

FASTING MY WAY TO PATIENCE!



"Surely the men who submit and the women who submit, and the believing men and the believing women, and the obeying men and the obeying women, and the truthful men and the truthful women, and the patient men and the patient women and the humble men and the humble women, and the almsgiving men and the almsgiving women, and the fasting men and the fasting women, and the men who guard their private parts and the women who guard, and the men who remember Allah much and the women who remember-- Allah has prepared for them forgiveness and a mighty reward."[33.35]

I was washing the dishes just now and had a random thought processing through my head. Could I stand the thought of not continuing to fast after the month of Ramadhan?

The answer was a quick and simple, NO.

I was THE most impatient person I knew. I would get angry, upset, and heated at the light of a switch. This terrible characteristic led me to be very short with people, and extremely rude. My impatience made me outspoken and I was often "let go" from my jobs because I just didn't have patience for dealing with people. Shame on me! I would push and shove others on the subway, I would breathe loudly and kiss my teeth when I had to wait in line for something, and I was extremely rude to my parents when I didn't feel like talking. Of course, as a Muslim now, I know that all these terrible flaws were part of my misguidance and lack of knowledge in "common courtesy".

I began changing slowly when I started reading about Islam, I learned that Muslims are very patient and kind. The greater the challenge, the greater humility.
I thought this to be something that I wanted to take on, and knew that being impatient was extremely unattractive. It took me about 3 months to learn about patience, and four months and counting to practice being patient. Being patient is not something you can master right way, it takes time and skill and perseverance.

Enter fasting. Fasting is by far another great gift from Allah. I started fasting the month after I became Muslim, mainly to begin my "purifying" process. I noticed many things since I started this fasting "detox".


I am now MUCH more patient with the small, medium, big things:

- I don't yell at my computer when it's lagging
- I don't pull on my hair hard when the knots don't come out
- I don't throw things around if they fall after I picked it up twice
- I can talk to my parents without yelling or being rude
- I can wait at the self-checkout at the grocery store (but after 10 minutes and still not being able to scan an item, I move onto the regular checkout! Still working on this one!)
- I don't sigh loudly, kiss my teeth, or mutter under my breath when things don't happen in my favour
- Waiting to break my fast has become a less difficult task as once was
- I am patient with strangers and smile when instead they are glaring at me with confusion
- I enjoy doing the dishes now
- I am STARTING to enjoy cleaning
- I don't get upset or angry at how my hijab looks because I can put it on properly now (Alhamdulilah!)
- I am starting to build a stronger foundation for what Allah has in store for me ( I pray that He may make things easier for me in this crazy dunya)
- I am not complaining about the heat as much. As I often wonder, if this is hot than how will The Day of Judgement be like?

The most important thing I have learned (and am still learning) to be patient with, is that, I don't get bothered or annoyed or as impatient than I once was with the thought of life and which direction I am headed in. I am patient and accepting that this life will be full of trials and errors and tests that my Creator, Allah has written for me. I am patient with the days that go by, and whenever I feel a bit of the shaitan trying to take over with that terrible flaw I once had, I ask Allah to help me with my guidance and I ask him to guide me with patience and adversity in all tasks, from small to big.

I must say, it's working!
Perhaps you should continue to fast after Ramadhan and you will notice the difference. Not only with developing more patience, but also in developing a more purified heart.


1 comment:

  1. I was fasting today :D... qadha :P heheh... Insya Allah I will fast again tomorrow ^_^

    ReplyDelete

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